feispionage
noun feis·pi·o·nage
1 : the activity of spying on dancers from other schools in order to steal their steps or routines.
Posts Categorized: Satire
The 7 Stages of Purchasing Your First Solo Dress
Another post for my Feis Dad Gig out on Antonio Pacelli. I noticed a similarity between a few different ‘life events’.
Typically, ‘The 7 Stages’ are associated with something completely different, but I have come to find, that they are the exact same stages of purchasing your first, and subsequent solo dresses.
Don’t believe me? See the The 7 Stages of Purchasing a Solo Dress
*Little Known Facts About Famous People
In case you missed it…
*Yes, I know he doesn’t have any sisters. I made that up ;)
Pack Up Your Feisin’ In Your Old Who Hut… wait, what!?
The other day, my husband said, “You know, when we move, we won’t need any boxes…we can just pack everything in your tote bags.” I looked around the room and had to agree. I could easily start my own bag kiosk at the mall. People are constantly telling me that I have a bag problem. My response is always that I can quit bags anytime.
After giving this some additional thought, I realized that I don’t have a BAG problem, I have a FEIS problem. There is just too much stuff I need to bring to be the ‘Perfectly Prepared Feis Mom’ (PPFM) and I can’t get a system down that doesn’t involve looking like the Beverly Hillbillies. At a recent Feis, you could buy a tee shirt with an image of a Feis Mom lugging five suitcases and four tote bags. I honestly thought that someone had snapped a photo of me and shaded it in (with a smaller butt).
Custom-dress Regret Anxiety and Panic Syndrome (CRAPS)
An in-depth look at something that, at one time or another, will affect us all, from new contributor, Patty O’Bench.
Have you put a deposit down on a solo dress? Are you checking email obsessively hoping for a photo or a FedEx tracking number? Do you worry endlessly that you’ve made a big mistake and you should have forked out the extra money for a Gavin?
You might be suffering from Custom-dress Regret Anxiety and Panic Syndrome or CRAPS. The symptoms of CRAPS change with each stage but might include the following:
Irish Dance Terms .v1
Term of the week is our attempt to label those Irish Dance things we know, but which don’t have a ‘real name’. The first one came out of my mouth tonight on the way home from dance practice, and I thought to myself, oh, I gotta start writing these nuggets down, so here goes.
hance
verb ˈhan(t)s, ˈhän(t)s
1 : to use only ones hands to practice all the steps in an Irish Dance routine.
hanc·ing
intransitive verb
1 : to engage in or perform Irish Dance steps with only the hands. This can be done in a seated or standing position
Well, so much for that ‘next big thing’….
After hearing about the ‘one soft shoe, one hard shoe’ performance idea, the Feis Association Regarding Comical Entertainment (FARCE) has banned the idea. In addition to muffled clicks from only one hard shoe, bangs were not happening as often as expected, and when they did, they were scaring the older judges because of there unexpected occurrence. So much for that idea.
New Irish Dance Trend…
…and you heard it here first!
This just in, a new hair style for competition is about to hit the streets and WTF acquired this previously unreleased photo from one of our sources. If I were you, I would expect to see mis-matched wig and hair colors as early as this weekend.
Sources also tell us that they have seen dancers wearing one hard shoe and one soft shoe to perform, and that will be the next big thing.
Note: I really hope you guys saw the sarcasm tag. I saw this on Twitter and knew it was a perfect WTF moment. ;) Thanks to @Kaylarosiee94 and @shaanabaanana for playing along!
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